Girl Math Got Me
by Priyanka Pardasani, Contributor
And my bank account is begging for just…math.
We’ve all used it.
“It was 40% off, but still over budget, so I technically saved money.”
“If I pay in cash, it’s like it never happened.”
“If I use a gift card and pay $20 extra, it’s basically free.”
The mental gymnastics are legendary, and “Girl Math” is the event where we all somehow walk away with a bunch of stuff we don’t really need.
But let’s be real: Girl Math didn’t just get us. It’s a framework that can cause a lot of trouble.
Exhibit A: The Latte Loop
You made coffee at home Monday through Thursday, so by Friday, that $5 oat milk latte is basically free. Right? You've earned it. You deserve it. You're being responsible, actually.
Girl Math: 1
Your savings account: 0
Exhibit B: The Return Reinvestment Program™
You returned a pair of shoes last week, and now you’re holding a brand new handbag saying, “It’s fine, this was paid for with the refund.” Like the money had an expiration date. Like it would’ve gone bad if not spent immediately.
Spoiler: It’s not a store credit from the universe. It’s money. You could've saved it. But no, you reinvested it. In leather. For the economy. For the culture.
Exhibit C: The “Technically Free” Ticket
You buy a concert ticket 4 months in advance. Show night arrives and it feels like a free event. Never mind the $100 you dropped on it in March. That's ancient history. Today, you're thriving. You're Beyoncé with a budget amnesia problem.
But here’s the kicker: We’re not dumb. We know what we’re doing.
Girl Math isn’t about a lack of intelligence. It’s about emotional accounting. It’s about self-soothing with spreadsheets. It’s about trying to feel in control when finances feel overwhelming.
So maybe it’s time we pivot from Girl Math to Grown Math.
Grown Math sounds like:
- “That was a fun splurge. Let me log it and adjust next week’s budget.”
- “Just because I can afford it doesn’t mean I need to.”
- “Returning something doesn’t mean I get a prize. It just means I got my money back.”
Don’t worry, this isn’t about shame. It’s about awareness. Because the same creativity that lets you spin financial fairy tales?
It’s the same creativity that can help you build a life where money supports your joy without sabotaging your goals.
So yes, maybe Girl Math got you. (It got me too.)
But Grown Math? That’s the real glow-up.
What’s your most unhinged Girl Math moment?
Tell us in the comments—we’re here to laugh and learn.
#GirlMath #BudgetingWithHumor #FinancialGlowUp #SimmeredDown
